The Cowbear's Christmas Shotgun Wedding (Curvy Bear Ranch 3) Page 7

  As he brushed the tip of his cock against her slick pussy, she writhed and whimpered, “Make love to me.”

  He positioned himself over her, ready to take her for the first time.

  And then he heard Mack holler from the other side of the bedroom door. “You guys sleeping in there?”

  Chapter 7

  “No. No. No. No. Dammit!” Kate swore as Logan rolled away from her.

  “I’ll get rid of him,” Logan whispered in her ear.

  She groaned and banged her fist into the mattress. Could Mack’s timing have been any worse? She needed Logan to take away the horror of losing the barn. Making love to him would have made her heart hurt a little less. It would have given her the strength she needed to finish repairing the house. And she wanted him in a hot-blooded, feral way that left her frustrated as hell.

  She snorted a laugh.

  “What?” Logan asked as he dressed.

  “Tell him his timing sucks.”

  “Hold that thought. I’ll be right back,” he said.

  She slumped back into the rumpled sheets. As she waited for Logan to return, lack of sleep and the stress from the fire pulled her eyelids closed. She couldn’t let herself fall asleep. He’d be back to finish what he started in a minute. Just one more…

  Hours later she woke to a cold bed.

  “Logan?”

  When she didn’t receive a response, she slipped out of bed. She pulled on a fresh pair of jeans, a long-sleeved shirt, and socks, and then wandered through the house looking for Logan.

  She’d made it to the living room when she heard banging coming from the front porch. She opened the door to find Logan hammering new boards into the floor.

  “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “This porch is driving me nuts. I feel like I’m going to fall through it every time I walk on it.”

  “You didn’t come back to bed,” she said.

  “I got caught up in talking to Mack about the barn. By the time I got back to your room, you were sleeping and I didn’t want to wake you.” He looked up and wiped sweat from his forehead.

  “Oh.” Disappointment curled around her belly, giving it an empty, hollow feeling. The passion that had sizzled between them was gone.

  “We should pick through what’s left of the barn and see if we can salvage anything,” he said.

  In that moment, she didn’t care about the barn. She wanted to reignite the fire between them, but she wasn’t sure if he really wanted her, or if he’d just been caught up in the moment when they’d been in the bathroom.

  “Come on, hon.” He stood and took her hand.

  Well at least he was still being affectionate.

  As they stepped off the porch, she turned to look at where the barn had once stood. A pile of burnt rubble was all that remained of the structure. Her stomach dropped. In the darkness last night, it hadn’t looked so terrible. But now, as she surveyed the destruction, her heart ached.

  “Don’t worry. My brothers are coming over later to help clean this up. I ordered a dumpster. We can start over and rebuild it better than it was,” Logan said.

  She released his hand and leaned over to pick up a melted lock. She let it fall to the scorched earth. “What’s the point?”

  “You can’t give up on this place,” Logan said.

  “I never wanted the ranch to begin with. I don’t know what’s gotten into me this week. I was supposed to just show up, clean out his stuff, and then sell it. Somewhere along the way…”

  “What is it, honey?”

  “Somewhere along the way I got caught up in wanting something I can never have,” she said.

  “What?”

  “Hope.”

  “You can’t give up hope. It’s what makes life worth living,” he said.

  “What does that even mean? I used to hope my father would stop beating my mother, but he didn’t stop. I used to hope he wouldn’t chase me with a hammer in one hand and a bottle of cheap tequila in the other. I used to hope…” her voice cracked. “Never mind.”

  “Tell me.”

  “I used to hope I’d find someone to love,” she whispered. “But that never happened either.”

  “Oh, honey.” He pulled her into his arms and caressed her hair. “You’ll find love. You just have to keep looking. Hell, I never thought Mack would get married and now he’s engaged. I know you don’t believe me when I say you deserved to be loved and cherished, but you do.”

  “I don’t believe in love.” She tilted her head up and gazed at him through tear-drenched eyes.

  “Love isn’t something you need to believe in, it just is. It’s all around you. Your friends love you, your family loves you—”

  “I don’t have any family left.”

  “I’m your family. My brothers are your family. Hell, everyone who’s lived here their entire lives are your family. This isn’t some big city full of strangers. There is a lot of love here, and I wish you could see it.” He clasped her hand and held it to her heart. “I wish you could feel it.”

  Her throat swelled. As much as she wanted to believe him, she couldn’t. She’d never felt anything but fear and pain on the ranch, and she couldn’t ever imagine living here.

  “Come stay with me for a few days. I’ll show you what it’s like to have love all around you,” he said.

  “Why? So I can lose it all?”

  “No, I want you to stay. I want to have time to explore whatever this is that’s growing between us.”

  “A few naked rolls around my bed doesn’t mean anything’s happening between us,” she countered.

  “You sound pretty sure about that. But do you really think I’d keep jumping into bed with you if I only wanted sex?” he asked.

  “I don’t know. You didn’t seem too discerning in high school.”

  “That was ten years ago. Haven’t you changed in the last ten years?”

  “Well, yes.”

  “Then couldn’t I have changed too?” he asked.

  “It’s possible.”

  “I’m not just spending time with you to get in your pants. I actually like being around you a lot. You’re sweet and funny and strong. I don’t know many women who would try to tear out and install windows by themselves.” He smiled.

  “It didn’t seem so hard to do until I cut myself.”

  “When do you need to go back to work?” he asked.

  “Right now. I’ve hardly touched the house.”

  “No, I mean, when do you need to return to Idaho?”

  “I’m off until January 2. I wasn’t sure how long it would take to sell the place,” she said.

  “I’ll make a deal with you. Stay with me, just for a few more days. Let me help you clean up the house and get rid of what’s left of the barn.”

  “I need to sell the horses too,” she said.

  “I’ll talk to Mack and see if we can buy them from you. If not, we can find someone to sell them to.”

  “I still have to clean out my father’s stuff.”

  “I can help you with that too.”

  He stepped forward and opened his arms. She wrapped her hands around his waist and lay her head on his chest. She could get used to being in his arms. If she wasn’t careful, she’d fall in love with him.

  ***

  As Logan helped her unpack towering piles of boxes from her father’s old bedroom, he couldn’t help sneaking glances at her profile. When she’d said she didn’t believe that love existed, his bear demanded that he show her what love felt like. He couldn’t imagine going through life feeling so unloved. He didn’t have much time left before she planned on leaving, but he would do whatever it took to convince her that love existed.

  “Oh, wow,” she said.

  He looked over to where she sat cross-legged on the floor. She held a yellowed, torn sheet of paper up to the light.

  “What is it?” he asked.

  “The first words I ever wrote.”

  “You’re kidding.”

  H
e set an unopened box on the ground and carefully picked a path through the other piles. When he reached her side, he cleared out a space next to her and sat. He took the paper from her hand and squinted at the faded pencil marks. He could just make out the words, “I love you, Daddy.”

  “I can’t believe he kept it,” she said.

  “He must have cherished it. What else is in that box?”

  After rifling through it, she pulled out another faded paper and handed it to him. “My first report card.”

  “All A’s,” he said. “You were smart even then.”

  “I had to be or else he’d get the belt.”

  “I’m sorry he couldn’t love you the way a parent is supposed to love their child.” He laid the paper back in the box and took her hand.

  “Why do you think he hated me so much?” she asked.

  The child-like quality of her voice tore at his soul. No child should ever have to feel like their parents didn’t love them.

  “Some parents just aren’t capable of love,” he said.

  “But why?”

  “Honestly? I think your dad had an addiction,” he said.

  “Are you saying he couldn’t help it? That it wasn’t his fault?”

  “No. I’m just saying that he had demons in his soul that sucked up all of the love that he should have given you.”

  “I always thought it was my fault.”

  “No, honey. His inability to love you was about him, not you.” He leaned over to wipe a tear from her cheek. “I’m sorry he hurt you so much.”

  “I think I’m done for the day,” she said.

  “Why don’t we go up to my house and get ready for dinner?”

  “I don’t really feel like being around a bunch of people right now,” she said.

  “I know what you need right now.”

  “What?”

  “Some holiday cheer.” When a small smile formed on her lips, his heart warmed. “We’re going to decorate the family Christmas tree tonight. Madison’s making eggnog and huckleberry hot chocolate. Rachel’s baking cookies. It’s a family tradition and I’d love it if you’d come with me.”

  “I might be too Scroogey right now.”

  “No. You’re perfect just the way you are,” he said.

  “I need a shower. I’m covered in dust.”

  “Why don’t you run and take a shower while I take some of this trash out to the dumpster?”

  “You’re too good to be real,” she said.

  His bear licked its lips salaciously. It would love to show her exactly how real he was. But he silently warned the beast to have patience. Now wasn’t the time to try to finish what they’d started that morning.

  Thirty minutes later, she emerged from her bedroom dressed in a thick, red wool dress and knee-high boots. He wanted to unwrap her like a Christmas present, but he kept himself in check.

  “You look beautiful,” he said.

  “Thank you. I usually feel better when I get dressed up. Do you think it’s okay or am I overdressed for tree trimming?”

  “You look great. When we get back to the house, I’m going to have to get cleaned up or I’ll look like a lump of coal next to a candy cane.”

  “I look like a candy cane?” she asked as confusion furrowed her brow.

  “Good enough to lick,” he said wickedly.

  She blushed until her cheeks matched her dress. He stepped forward, careful to keep his dusty clothes away from her. As he swooped in for a kiss, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. He forgot about everything but the warmth of her lips against his. Sighs of pleasure spilled from her mouth between kisses. He groaned and deepened the kiss, lifting her off her feet and twirling her in a circle.

  When he set her down, she grinned. “Wow.”

  “Yeah.”

  He laced her fingers into his and they walked hand in hand through the snow to his home. Before going inside, he stopped and pulled her in for another kiss. He couldn’t get enough of her and he hadn’t even made love to her—yet.

  It was only a matter of time before she agreed to stay. He wouldn’t take her to bed again unless he knew for sure that he’d have enough time to explore a relationship with her. His bear whined and bitched about how he wanted Kate, but he’d have to wait. She wasn’t like all of the other women he’d dated. She wasn’t a passing amusement. There was more to it, and he’d do whatever it took to convince her to stay because he wasn’t ready to let her go.

  Inside the house, Christmas music streamed from strategically placed speakers in the living room. He helped her out of her coat then set it on a hanger in the closet. As he guided her into the living room, Madison looked up from her spot on the floor. She held a knitted reindeer ornament in one hand and a silver hook in the other.

  “Hey, we weren’t sure if you were going to make it. I’m so glad you’re here,” she said.

  “Kate just took her time getting ready. You know women,” he joked.

  “I did not,” Kate said as she playfully slapped his arm.

  “I made huckleberry hot cocoa, eggnog, and winter peppermint tea. Which would you like?” Madison asked.

  “The huckleberry hot cocoa sounds amazing,” Kate said.

  “I’ll have some too,” Logan said.

  He didn’t normally drink girly drinks, but what the hell, why not? It would go well with the cookies he knew were coming. The scent of gingerbread permeated the air. He inhaled deeply. His bear loved snapping the arms, legs, and head off the gingerbread men before devouring their torsos. It was a bear thing.

  “I’ve never seen such a huge tree,” Kate said as she pulled him toward the Christmas tree.

  “We cut it down yesterday,” Mack said.

  “It must be fun being able to cut down whichever tree you want,” Kate said.

  “Actually, a lot of the forest around here is protected. It’s illegal to cut down trees without a permit. But there’s a Christmas tree farm just up the road. They grow the trees year-round and replant them as they’re cut down,” Logan said.

  Brady walked in from the hall with Rachel and Jimmy in tow. After everyone greeted each other, Jimmy hurled himself at the huge box of family ornaments in the center of the room.

  Rachel ran over and grabbed his hand. “Hang on honey, we need to wait for everyone else to arrive.”

  “Let him put one on,” Logan said. “I’m sure Hank, Drew, and Cody won’t mind.”

  As if on cue, his other brothers came in through the front door. They stomped their boots and shook snow out of their hair.

  “It just started snowing again,” Hank said.

  “We checked the fence lines on both properties. Everything looks fine for now, but we’ll take turns keeping watch. But I think we can spare an hour for the tree-trimming party, right?” Drew asked.

  “I don’t see why not,” Logan said.

  “The gingerbread men are ready,” Madison said as she swooped into the room with their mom’s old cookie tray.

  “Those look amazing,” Kate said.

  Logan loved the way Kate’s eyes lit up as she picked up one of the finely decorated cookies. When she snapped an arm off, he couldn’t help but chuckle.

  “What?” Kate asked.

  “You’re so cute when you’re ferocious.”

  “Wait until you see me take its head off.” She grinned as she chose a seat on the sofa.

  After sitting next to her, he leaned over and whispered, “I’m glad I’m not a cookie.”

  “Mommy, can I have a snowflake and a gingerbread man?” Jimmy asked.

  “Absolutely,” Rachel said. She set one of each cookie on a small plate and handed it to her son. She passed a gingerbread man over to Brady. “I know this one is your favorite. I still remember that time you bought all of them from me at the high school bake sale. I couldn’t figure out why you needed so many cookies.”

  “And I ate every one of them that night. I thought I was going to die,” Brady said. He chuckled and wrapped an a
rm around his mate’s waist. He drew her toward their father’s old overstuffed chair. She squealed as he pulled her into his lap.

  Logan glanced at Kate out of the corner of his eye. He wanted to pull her into his lap too, but didn’t want to embarrass her in front of his family. Instead, he inched closer to her on the sofa.

  When all six brothers, Rachel, Jimmy, and Madison finally found seats, Mack stood. While balancing a cup of eggnog in one hand, he struck a dramatic pose with his other hand. He held it outstretched as if he was about to decree something. It was a stance their father had perfected. After his death, they’d carried on the tradition.

  “In the great tradition of our ancestors…” Mack waited until all the laughter died down. “I now decree this the official start of the annual tree-trimming party.”

  They clinked glasses and immediately started various conversations. While the brothers milled about the room, Rachel wiped cookie crumbs off of Jimmy’s mouth. For a moment, Logan wondered what it would be like to have a son. He’d never really thought about having kids, but after seeing how happy Brady had become since finding out about Jimmy, he couldn’t help but wonder.

  He laced his fingers into Kate’s and handed her a mug of cocoa. As she took the first sip, she smiled around the rim of the cup. Twinkling Christmas lights reflected off of her lake-blue eyes. She glowed like an angel.

  “What?” she asked.

  “Nothing.”

  “You’re staring at me.”

  “I can’t help it,” he said.

  “Tell me about the ornaments.”

  He glanced at the small, heart-shaped silver frame in Jimmy’s hands. “That’s the frame my grandfather gave my grandmother on their first Christmas together. It’s a photograph of them that was taken when they were dating. During the Great Depression, they didn’t have much. He worked a second job in town all year, hoping to save enough to give her a gift.”

  “I bet she loved it.”

  “She did. We hang it on the tree every year as a reminder of their love.”

  “What about that one?” she asked as she pointed to a star made out of Popsicle sticks.